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Chapter 61
It started to rain at night, and Chen Wan sneaked into the kitchen secretly.
When I washed my hands and got ready to work, I noticed that my hands were shaking non-stop. I insisted on taking out the mixed noodles and mixed stuffing. When I sat down, my legs were soft.
She didn¡¯t know how long she sat there.
"Dear Provincial Party Committee, Provincial Government and Provincial Discipline Inspection Commission"
Dad¡¯s voice flashed through my mind, and my whole body trembled again like chaff. The questions that have been lingering in her heart for several years finally have an answer. Before this answer that makes her relatively stable and complete world almost collapse, the true hearts of Jiang Xiaowei, Wu Leya, and Qin Hao, her jealousy and self-harm Worth mentioning.
In order to calm down her anxious mood at night, she opened her mother's diary and savored her parents' lasting affection. In the past two years or so, my life has been occupied by studies and Qin Hao. This is the first time I have read my mother's diary so seriously. From time to time I muttered it aloud, and from time to time I smiled knowingly. The diary ends before their marriage, probably because the busyness after marriage interrupted the diary habit, but reading it from beginning to end is like experiencing their youth.
After covering up the book, she still couldn't fall asleep. She picked it up and turned it over inadvertently. Looking at the desk lamp, Chen Wan suddenly discovered that several of the pictures on the back were uneven, and there were obvious scratch marks on the back. She rubbed it with her fingertips, but couldn't make out the specific handwriting. Suddenly, I found a pencil and applied it diagonally. The white paper gradually turned lead color, and my father's handwriting slowly appeared.
¡°Dear Provincial Party Committee, Provincial Government, Provincial Discipline Inspection Commission, and respected leaders at all levels: I solemnly swear by my party spirit and life that the following statements are all true"
Her face was cold, and she wiped it with the back of her hand before she realized it was full of tears.
My dad is not a bad person. She wanted frantically to open the window and scream to the world. The more she resisted this urge, the more her body trembled. Finally knowing the answer, if it weren't for her father's last words before he made the desperate move, I'm afraid she would have gradually believed in the illusion as the years passed. It turns out that her father doesn't love her. Although he chose to take responsibility for his mistakes in the dilemma, he still thought of protecting her. He knew that she was young and could not bear the cruel reality, so he hid everything and waited for her. Discovered when you grow up. It turned out that he didn't leave a word behind. He said: "I'm sorry, my little baby. In the end, I can only apologize to you and repent to your mother."
??Dad, dad
¡°What does she do to clear her father¡¯s name? What should she do? Who told her what she should do?
The lights were dim, the pots were quiet, and the bleak wind outside the window was blowing into the residual rain. She sat in a small corner and began to press the bun wrappers, collect the fillings, twist the tops into flowers and arrange them in the small steamer. Repeated over and over again, using a silent power to fight against the despair that is on the verge of collapse. One cage, two cages layer by layer.
When my uncle came in, he was a little surprised to see two rows of tall steamers. "What time did you get up? Didn't you sleep all night?"
"Uncle" She suddenly choked up when she opened her mouth. Under the light, her temples were white with frost. Unexpectedly, her uncle was already old. She swallowed back her words, "I woke up when I couldn't sleep."
Gong Ziqiang looked at the remaining tears on her face, washed his hands and moved a stool to sit down. While kneading his face, he asked: "I heard your aunt said that you have a good male classmate? Did you have a quarrel on the phone at night?" Seeing that she remained silent, he continued: "Uncle is not an old-fashioned person. If you have any good things, bring them back to see. If you have any grievances, don't hide them. I will help you."
Chen Wan nodded, feeling extremely uncomfortable and nauseated.
"You and your mother have the same temper, and so does your mother. No matter how unhappy she is, she will be able to hold on alone. She suffers outside and never says anything when she comes home. Her illness is the same. Go to the hospital early, and you may not know how much longer you can live. Year."
"Uncle"
"Don't imitate your mother. It's your own body that is hurting you. If you have something to say, tell your uncle and he will help you."
explain? Did not say? With my uncle's jealous temper, he would probably have to petition endlessly after he found out. According to what his father's suicide note said, he sent a total of two letters of accusation, and they should all have fallen into disgrace, otherwise he would not have chosen a dead end in the end. In this way, now that they have no more to rely on, can their family afford the unpredictable consequences? My uncle and aunt are in their twilight years, Xiaoyu has just entered life, and there is still a shocking scar on the uncle's abdomen. That letter is enough to overturn the peaceful life
Chen Wan choked and kept nodding, looking at her uncle's white hair, and finally swallowed it all.
After selling, she pushed the cart home early. She stood in front of the window and looked downstairs. The building in front blocked her view, but she knew Qin Hao should still be in the car at the corner. While selling breakfast, she had discovered someone else in the car, watching her every move. Her heart was on the verge of collapse, and she had no time to take into account the jealousy and resentment she felt last night.
Suddenly I had an impulseA longing, like the sea overflowing the embankment. He is clearly someone who is not worthy of trust. The person he wants to see the most at this moment is actually him.
"Why are you here?" she asked, standing by the car door.
He stretched out his hand to pick her up and sit down. "I can't sleep. You're almost up soon, so I came here to take a look. I didn't expect you to be helping your aunt sell breakfast. It's such a cold morning, why don't you get more sleep?"
If he didn't care, why would he silently look at her on the street corner at dawn? If you cared, why would you deliberately lie? She couldn't understand. There were many things she couldn't understand.
What she could see was the miserable autumn rain outside the window, and she was hopelessly longing for his warmth.
"I know you are angry, and your phone is always turned off. Even if you see me here, you pretend not to see me. But I still wait until you come down, right? Cat"
Chen Wan interrupted him, "Hug me, okay?"
Qin Hao looked at her, and he had never seen her look so timid and helpless, and she was at a loss for a moment. He opened his hands tentatively, and she had already thrown herself in, nestling in his arms. Her limp body was shaking slightly, as if she was crying. He pushed her hair aside, and sure enough, half of her face was wet, and she was even more panicked, "Don't cry, talk to me if you have something to say. Are you angry with me? It's my fault, I shouldn't lie to you. I just feel Wu Leya has nothing to say, she has nothing to do with us. I didn't do it for her yesterday, it was because of my mother Mao'er, let's stop crying, okay? Just hit me when you're angry." He held her hand and pushed it towards himself Face shot.
Chen Wan just kept shaking her head, the huge despair with nowhere to vent pressed in her chest. From sobbing to howling, only this can relieve a little bit of the pain that is about to burst.
Qin Hao was in a state of confusion and blamed himself repeatedly: "Why did you drop the golden beans when you were so good? It's all my fault. I won't hide anything from you from now on, okay? Stop crying. It makes my heart ache. .¡±
His comfort aroused her unspeakable sadness, which became increasingly uncontrollable.
The soft body in his arms kept trembling, and the familiar feeling of regret soaked into the pores and penetrated all the limbs. As time passed, Qin Hao did not persuade her anymore, but slowly stroked her back with his palms until she stopped crying and only sobbed.
¡°What happened at home?¡±
Chen Wan shook her head.
"You look like a cat. Hey, you're still spitting bubbles." He wiped away the bubbles from her nose. Seeing that she wanted to laugh in embarrassment, she opened her mouth but then lowered it, and couldn't help but feel sad, "What's wrong? ?What¡¯s the big deal? Can¡¯t you tell me?¡±
She still shook her head.
Qin Hao suppressed the rising anxiety and depression of being distrusted, pretended to smile relaxedly and said, "Is that because of me? Because of Wu Leya? She cried so much that heaven and earth turned pale. Can I regard this as jealousy?"
"Don't tease me. I'm fine. I just feel uncomfortable thinking about my parents. It's like I suddenly realized today that the world is dark and there is nothing left."
"What nonsense are you talking about? If you don't still have your uncle, then you still have me, right?"
The palm of his hand that held her cheek to wipe her tears was gentle and strong. Chen Wan tightened her mouth and fell silent again.
"You haven't slept all night? You have dark circles under your eyes." He rubbed her head and said seriously: "There was a reason yesterday. When I was leaving, my mother grabbed me to talk about big things. Big things in life, big things in marriage. I It¡¯s time to get married since the eldest is the youngest. We¡¯ve already chosen the person, and we¡¯re just waiting for her to say a word.¡±
There should be many things he omitted, but Chen Wan had no time to pay attention to him. She was trapped in his serious and focused eyes, and her strong shield was fragile. "Really, really getting married?" There seems to be an enemy in her life called "bad luck", waiting in her future, ready to strike hard at any time. She was on guard, lest she lose her happiness. So tired. Even if it was dead grass instead of driftwood, she couldn't care less at this moment. "Really getting married?"
His silence made Chen Wan feel panicked for a few seconds, and then she saw him curling up the corners of his mouth, as if he was getting rid of the shock and excitement, and suddenly his whole body glowed with light.
He looked at her and smiled for a long time, then he took her palm and put it to his lips and kissed her, keeping his eyes on her left and right, and said in a low voice: "Really get married. Cat, marry me? Nod to me, no need to say anything, just Nod."
Chen Wan suddenly felt extremely panicked in his eager eyes, but she heard him say: "Do you know how long I have been waiting for today? Every day is like swinging, with happiness and fear on one side, swinging back and forth, unable to control myself, forever. It can¡¯t be implemented.¡±
It turned out that he had the same feeling. He was worried about gains and losses, and his restless heart was tortured to pieces.
She nodded gently as if she was hypnotized.
His expression of instant ecstasy penetrated her heart like thunder.
He kissed her, kissed her passionately. She kissed back, just as fiercely. Biting his lips and sucking his tongue, desperately trying to catch something and prove something. There has never been a kiss like this.
She knew that many years later she would remember this moment and the dreamlike feeling when she was shocked by happiness. (Remember the website address: www.hlnovel.com)The tongue, desperately trying to grasp something, to prove something. There has never been a kiss like this.
She knew that many years later she would remember this moment and the dreamlike feeling when she was shocked by happiness. (Remember the website address: www.hlnovel.com