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- Is this feeling painful?
Lu Xin couldn't explain it himself. He didn't even know why he was crying, but the tears kept flowing out.
Maybe it¡¯s because you saw yourself clearly for the first time?
¡¡
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Growing up to this age, Lu Xin¡¯s life has always been confusing.
Even his memories are always gray. Intermittently, he didn't even want to think about it carefully. Because, in the several attempts he made to recall those things, every time he remembered them, they were particularly depressing things.
However, a report card from the old dean suddenly made several stages of his life extremely clear.
He didn¡¯t try to discuss it with his family, but that report card and the several trials on the report card.
Because he knows very well.
Seeing the Trial of Life reminded him of the initial stages of his vague memories.
I recalled that I seemed to wake up from an abstract nightmare and was ignorant of everything in the world.
He remembered the nightmare clearly, but could not describe the scene in the dream to others.
Because everything in that dream was abstract and could not be explained in human language.
All perceptions in the dream clearly tell me that the world is meaningless.
If we talk about trials, it is the first and most meaningless trial, but in the end, it has its own meaning.
Your own arrival and perception of this world is a trial.
¡¡
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But after that trial, I was still confused.
I just looked at the people and everything around me curiously, feeling that everything was new and interesting, but it didn¡¯t matter.
Until now, when Lu Xin recalled the time in the orphanage, she still remembered that she looked at the scenes and appearances around her with an unusually calm gaze, but she didn't understand why others could cry and laugh. Rich emotions.
At that time, I felt like I was trapped in a thick shell.
When he saw the pain and anger of others, he felt that it didn't matter, he didn't understand it, he just felt it was hypocritical.
Teacher Xiaolu is actually a very stupid girl. .
Without knowing anything about herself, she regarded herself as a friend and stubbornly believed that she was kind.
Actually, from now on, the person who understands me best is Number Seven.
?Perhaps this is because she is also the type closest to a monster?
¡°All perceptions started on that rainy night.
That night of betrayal and blood, gunfire and fire, the death of life and the destruction of hope, woke me up.
The thick shell was finally broken, and I felt the pain.
That was the first time I felt pain clearly.
What happens later
Lu Xin still remembered that his memory fell into chaos. For at least two or three years, he had no idea how he got here. He only calculated from the time that he should have been wandering on the streets for a long time. He was killed by his family. She took him in and began to live a normal and healthy life and study, until one night, when I came home from overtime work, I met Teacher Xiaolu.
Her legs are broken.
I started working hard, making money, taking care of them, and helping them.
It was also during that time that my memories of the orphanage began to take on color.
When I first experienced those things in the orphanage, I just felt indifferent. But from that moment on, when I recalled these things, I felt more and more interesting. Sometimes, I even couldn't help but smile at the corner of my mouth.
This can be regarded as, after losing it, you begin to know its goodness?
It¡¯s very tiring, but it seems that the most fulfilling years were those years.
Lu Xin thought that if he continued like this, he would actually be very satisfied.
But, life will go on after all.
Joined the Special Clearance Department, met spiritual monsters, learned about spiritual pollution, and also learned about so-called ability users.
I discovered that my family members are very capable people and can help me a lot.
"However, they all seem to have their own secrets. They are hiding it from themselves intentionally, but they are actually being cautious subconsciously and cooperating with them to hide some secrets. It's like they are playing an unconscious game tacitly.The bearded man with a very mature appearance immediately stepped forward and whispered to her: "We have obtained the items in the Will-o'-the-Wisp Swamp. Also, we seem to have aroused the vigilance of the Negative Zero troops, and now they are North, approaching us quickly."
"Negative Zero Force?"
"Eldest Sister" frowned and sneered: "Looking for death."
Many people nearby laughed out loud, pulled out the spears from their gun bags, put them on their shoulders, and said, "Fuck them?"
The eldest sister wanted to agree immediately, but suddenly hesitated, looked in the direction of Black Marsh City, and shook her head.
"Forget it this time, withdraw."
Everyone else looked at her curiously.
"If we meet the Negative Zero Force now, at least half of you will die."
The eldest sister said coldly: "I'm in a bad mood today and I'm too lazy to pick someone to fill your vacancies."
The tough men and girls around him suddenly laughed knowingly.
The motorcycle started, and like ghosts, they quickly followed the path next to the swamp, heading towards the man. The bright lights of the motorcycle rushed into the darkness, forming seven or eight intertwined paths, enough to compete with The red moon competes with the white light.
The eldest sister rode her bike and rushed to the front, the engine whining, frightening away countless small beasts or other things.
Her brows seemed to be frowning tightly, as if she was thinking about something.
After driving a few hundred meters, she suddenly understood. Her expression suddenly became clear, followed by anger.
"Old guy, are you taking advantage of me?"
She cursed in a low voice: "Why do you always favor him so much?"
No one around answered. Even the knights who crowded around her and rushed forward were used to her sudden emotional outbursts and unprovoked curses, and turned a blind eye to it. But she herself became more and more fierce as she scolded her, as if all the dissatisfaction in her heart came out at once: "Obviously I am the only one you should care about and invest in the most, but in the end you only value that monster"
"Is it true that only disobedient people can make you pay more attention to me, then I have no problem at all"
"I can be more rebellious than him"
""
""
The more she talked, the crazier she became, and she even beat her head with her hands angrily.
Because the commotion was so fierce this time, even the knight next to her felt worried and looked towards her.
"I'm fine"
The woman looked up at them, her eyes were blood red, but her face was full of tears. She explained fiercely: "I was bitten by a weird dog. It seems to affect my emotions. I am now , I obviously want to laugh out loud"
As she spoke, she pointed at her face: "But I'm crying"
The surrounding knights all turned their heads. What she said seemed reasonable.
But in the past, she would not have explained this.
¡°After the woman explained, she suddenly twisted the accelerator and rushed forward fiercely, as if she wanted to use the wind to dry her tears.
"Damn, disgusting, so disgusting"
She gritted her teeth and growled in a low voice: "You're just bullying me for having no brains, right?"
"I have a brain, but I just don't like to use it"
"I'm already capable, why do I still need to use my brain to deal with these things?"
""
The more she spoke, the more she hated her. At the end, a cold smile appeared on her face: "Old man, you will definitely fail."
"You often say that divinity can be calculated."
"But, he now has more than just divinity and humanity. How do you calculate that?"
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