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Chapter 823 Reflect on Yourself

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    Chu Lihua discovered that obtaining happiness is actually very simple.

    Sometimes, as long as a small action, a slight care, is enough.

    Only continuous happiness can make people happy all the time.

    Some people accumulate resentment and pain, while others choose and learn to face life positively and infect those around them.

    Chu Lihua has always tried her best to be the latter kind of person.

    Together with fellow travelers over the Braille library, with everyone I know and care about.

    Just like Chu Lihua thought that Qing Yunfei might replace her work in the Braille library, but the partners of the Soul Journey Club spontaneously took turns to replace Chu Lihua.

    See, this is what the usual pay will always be rewarded.

    Chu Lihua also thought about it clearly. As for Qing Yunfei, it must be because her efforts are not enough!

    Since even the original group of strangers have been recruited into people who are willing to help him for free, let alone Qing Yunfei who gets along day and night.

    People's emotions are divided into negative and positive, but what is certain is that they are deadly enemies who will never meet.  So, just stay positive.

    Chu Lihua has read a true story from abroad before.

    Ruth is a single mother. She feels depressed every day. It's not because her husband abandoned her three years ago. She has been like this since 25 years ago.

    Suddenly one day a miracle appeared, Ruth won the $22 million lottery prize, and she was so happy that she was going crazy.  She immediately quit her job, bought a mansion and the most expensive sports car, and sent her children to private schools.

    Ordinarily, she should feel very happy and happy.  But strangely, as time went by, she became depressed again, and finally the psychiatrist diagnosed her as chronic depression, although she had no reason for depression at all.

    Therefore, the key to happiness lies in the state of mind.

    Chu Lihua knew that if she had no experience, she had to learn from those who had experience.

    Therefore, books and travelers are the last options.

    Well, now, conditions do not allow to ask travelers for advice; we can only seek answers in books.

    The reason why marriages are unhappy is often because both husband and wife ignore that people will continue to change.  The most important point in managing a marriage is to accept changes so that both parties can achieve self-improvement in this married life.

    There are five stages that a happy marriage must go through: re-cognition, understanding differences, self-understanding, effective expression, forgiveness and reconciliation.

    The book says that if you are unhappy in your married life, it is probably because you have a wrong understanding of marriage itself, which leads to your unhealthy attitude towards marriage.

    For example, before you get married, because you regard marriage as a certain task or the wish of your parents to complete, it makes you unwilling to maintain this relationship with your heart after marriage.

    For another example, if you think that getting married is two people living together, it will definitely be boring after a long time, so you don't bother to take the initiative to add fun to your married life.

    Chu Lihua felt that she was the first type, while Qing Yunfei was the latter.

    For example, sometimes, as soon as I feel that my marriage is not happy, I feel that it is a forced choice that has led to the current result.

    And Qing Yunfei always said, am I not good enough for you?  Is it too bad to beg for food?

    It is precisely because of the existence of these misconceptions that it is difficult for most people to obtain a happy marriage.

    Therefore, the first stage leading to a happy marriage should be to re-understand the essence of marriage.

    So, what is the essence of marriage?  Think about it in real life, do you often hear or see such scenes, when many people complain about their unhappy married life, they often say, "He changed after getting married, and he no longer looks like when he was in love.  Then accommodate me."

    The implied meaning of this sentence is actually: you think that the other party's change is caused by marriage, so you feel that marriage is the grave of love.

    Chu Lihua had a feeling of enlightenment. She was not married at that time, and every Valentine's Day was a 520 red envelope.

    All kinds of favorite things, as long as you say it yourself.  After a while, it will suddenly appear in front of my eyes.

    Thinking about it, in fact, it was precisely because I felt love that I married Qing Yunfei!

    Those memories that I remembered when I was dissatisfied with Qing Yunfei.  Because they are all negative frequency areas, so, in retrospect, of course they are all negative.  Not good anymore.

    Another point is that when the relationship changes, people's state of mind will definitely change.

    A marriage goes awayThe reason for the dead end is precisely because you ignore that people will change, just like the ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus said: "A person cannot step into the same river twice", and the same is true for marriage.

    People are constantly changing individuals, and the relationship between people is also constantly changing in this ebb and flow. Only by learning to actively deal with changes, and constantly investing and managing the marriage can we truly maintain a relationship.

    Furthermore, everyone's marriage cannot be smooth sailing, but it is precisely because of these ups and downs and changes that provide unlimited potential for the development of a happy marriage.

    Chu Lihua read a passage before, and found it difficult to understand at the time, but now, she seems to have a new understanding of it.

    "Materialist dialectics believes that the material world is a unified whole that is universally connected and constantly changing."

    Whether it is sudden accidents, natural disasters, or wars and economic crises, each of us can clearly experience the earth-shaking external changes around us.

    However, as a part of the material world, people's own changes are often ignored by themselves.

    Now when I think back to myself five years ago, I can't help but sigh, it turns out that my personality has changed so much, and the way I look at and deal with problems is no longer as lacking in thinking as before.

    People and the relationship between people are constantly changing. Thinking back to Qing Yunfei's married life, he may make some disappointing actions. At this time, the best way is to learn to tolerate and welcome changes  , and tolerate differences with mutual respect.

    However, since two people exist as independent individuals, there must be some friction in life due to various differences.

    We can't always just blindly ask others to change for ourselves, and we should be the commander now, right?

    It's like learning to swim, no matter how many skills and precautions you tell a person; if he doesn't go into the water and try it himself, it is impossible to learn it.

    The swimming coach went into the water personally to demonstrate, over and over again, tirelessly.

    And this is just because you paid and paid.

    Could it be, a happy marriage for a lifetime.  Isn't it worth paying for yourself like a coach?  Do it yourself like that?

    Chu Lihua asked herself in her heart.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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