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All kinds, this trip, all the magnificent scenery, are not worth the baptism of the soul this time.
Perhaps their club should be called a spiritual journey!
The fifth voice asked eagerly, "Is that the end? What about Du Fu, let's talk about Du Fu."
¡ª¡ª"If you have reservations, you can look forward to it. Let's keep Du Fu as an appetizer for our next trip. Then, let's invite our beautiful and generous boss to tell us the real method of spiritual cleansing."
As soon as Yaolivas' words fell, there was warm applause.
Chu Lihua felt a little embarrassed, "Everyone discusses and studies together. Why is the whole appetizer so grand? Then what is the next dish I serve? Appetizer soup before dinner? Well, that's the way it is. Since It's an appetizer soup, let's have an appetizer together."
Another burst of laughter and applause.
Chu Lihua cleared her throat, and said in a slow tone, "The reason, we will accumulate little by little during this trip, but most of the time, we all understand the reason.
How can it really work on yourself? This is the real fortress of our challenge. Only by breaking through it can we occupy the commanding heights of our lives.
I used to quit smoking because of people around me. I read a medical survey. If a cardiologist tells a patient with severe respiratory inflammation or more dangerous asthma, if he does not change his personal living habits, such as unhealthy eating and drinking , smoking, etc., they will surely die afterwards.
Is this serious? This has not changed, when will it be? We bystanders must all think so, but when it really happens to us, we will find that things are really not what we imagined.
The power of habit addiction is terrible, even in the face of life and death, most people will still be unable to control their behavior.
That research report showed that only 17 people would really change their living habits. Do the remaining 67 people want to live? of course not. They must know what to do, but they still can't change it.
This is a problem we often encounter in the process of change: we have a behavioral standard in our hearts, and we hope to achieve it ourselves, but we are often beaten by reality. It seems that we have a self in our hearts, but the reality is another self.
Sometimes, we obviously hate a certain behavior of ours, such as procrastination, but we can't change it. At this time, we will have a lot of guilt and self-blame in our hearts, blaming ourselves for weak willpower and not working hard enough.
However, blaming yourself won't bring about change. Instead, we should seriously think: Why can't we control ourselves?
In fact, there are two selves in our body. One is the emotional self and the other is the rational self. Distinguishing between these two selves and understanding their relationship is very important for our understanding of change.
Positive psychologist Jonathan Haidt once used an interesting metaphor to describe the relationship between two selves.
He said that human emotions are like an elephant, and reason is like a rider. The mahout rides on the back of the elephant, holding the rein in his hand, as if he is directing the elephant.
But in fact, his strength is insignificant compared with that of an elephant. Once there is a conflict with an elephant¡ªthe rider wants to go left, and the elephant wants to go right¡ªthen he usually can't beat the elephant.
Even if it is not a huge elephant, even if it is a common horse, if you don't master the tricks, it may be difficult to get it to listen to you, right?
The famous psychotherapist Erickson discovered the mystery of how to control horses when he was a child.
At that time, his family owned a farm with a horse farm. Before dark, the horses need to be driven into the stable. But the horse's temper came up, and he was quite stubborn. The farther you pull, the farther it goes, so that it often takes several workers to subdue a horse in the end.
And at that time, little Erickson thought of a way, since you want to go against me, then I will pull you out. Hey, it's all right now, little Erickson easily pulled the horse back to Ma Pengli.
So, the psychologist summed up a sentence. For change, reason provides direction and emotion provides motivation.
If human reason wants to achieve the goal of change, it needs to understand the temper and disposition of the elephant, the emotion, and use the characteristics of the elephant to get twice the result with half the effort. Otherwise, change will be very difficult.
So, what is the temper of an elephant? According to psychologists, elephants have three characteristics.
First, it is powerful, once it is aroused, it is difficult for reason to control it.
Second, it is emotionally driven. It is easy to be driven by negative emotions such as anxiety and fear, and it is easy to??Motivated by positive emotions such as love, compassion, compassion, loyalty, etc.
Therefore, it can be both a resistance to change and a driving force for change.
Third, it is governed by enhanced experience. It only recognizes the "benefit of experience" that we have actually experienced, and does not recognize the "benefit of expectation" conceived by reason.
The first two are easier to understand. The key is what are the "benefits of expectation" and "benefits of experience".
To put it bluntly, the benefits of expectation are the benefits of imagination. For example, we can all *think* that getting up early and running every day will make you more energetic; not procrastinating, you will be more efficient and have a sense of accomplishment; sticking to a healthy diet will make your body better.
But these are all imaginary, and we may not have experienced this benefit deeply.
On the contrary, we have experienced the warmth of the quilt when sleeping late, the joy of watching novels and TV, and the sensory stimulation of eating and drinking. These are the benefits of experience.
The benefits of expectation are abstract and untouchable at present, while the benefits of experience are concrete and have been experienced;
The benefit of expectation occurs in the future, while the benefit of experience occurs in the past or present; the benefit of expectation is taught, while the benefit of experience is felt.
When the benefit of expectation and the benefit of experience conflict, although the rider wants to seek the benefit of expectation, the elephant under him involuntarily turns to the benefit of experience.
Even sometimes, the benefits of expectation are much greater than the benefits of experience.
Bapnov did an experiment with dogs and food.
At the beginning, the dog walked around freely in the cage, but once it made a certain action, food would fall in from the feeding port above; The rule of thumb is that the food comes because of one of its actions.
In this experiment, the dog was simply reinforced by the food that appeared after its action.
Some human behaviors are also shaped according to this principle. We can think of reinforcement as the benefit of experience, and once we gain a benefit from a certain behavior, it is retained in the experience. Even if we don't realize it, it can still affect our behavior. "(Remember this site URL: www.hlnovel.com - Didn't finish reading? Add this book to your favoritesI'm a member and bookmarked this chapterCopy the address of this book and recommend it to your friends for pointsChapter error? Click here to report
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