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Chapter 737 Separation is the Eternal Theme

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    ?

    Mother's argument made Chu Lihua feel sad for a while.  I have stayed with Qing Yunfei for so long, how could he just leave like that?

    Also, have Qing Yunfei and Qin Jiu stayed together during this time?  Could it be that?

    Chu Lihua quickly shook her head vigorously, not daring to continue thinking.

    The phone was hung up amidst mother's cursing.

    Also, why does mother care so much about Xiao Qi who has no blood relationship with her family?

    After coaxing Xiao Qi to sleep, Chu Lihua became more and more bored.

    In the past, she had hope, that Qing Yunfei would come back.

    Nowit's been a few days

    And Qin Jiu, obviously just said to go out for a walk, and never came again.

    Will the two of them be together?

    Chu Lihua was frightened into a cold sweat by her own thoughts.

    It was late at night, but she couldn't sleep. She paced back and forth in the room.

    She found an e-book at random and started reading, hoping to calm down and integrate into the world of books.

    Although I didn't read the title of the book, Chu Lihua was attracted by the first sentence.

    More than 2,000 years ago, Zhuo Wenjun gave Sima Xiangru a sentence in the "White-headed Song": "I wish to have a person with one heart, and the white head will not be separated."

    It seems that whether in ancient times or modern times, intimacy is an eternal topic for human beings.

    Living in this whirling world, there are so many rich experiences - joy, sadness, worry, fear, happiness, boredom, confusion, excitement

    Everyone needs connection and companionship, no one can be strong alone, and the achievements that no one shares will only become another kind of sorrow.

    Zhuo Wenjun said: "I wish to have a person with one heart." However, whether we can get "a person with one heart" depends on our own heart.

    If our own hearts are split, clinging to one end of good and bad, good and evil, strong and weak, right and wrong, always clinging to our old cognition, unable to go beyond the ideology of binary opposition, then we  It is impossible to get "one-hearted people".

    Chu Lihua was a little fascinated.

    Without peace, there will be aggression: if you attack internally, you will often feel annoyed and guilty, and in relationships, it will be manifested as flattery and sacrifice;

    If you don't want to face your own aggressiveness, you will project this part onto your partner, complaining, accusing, or covertly attacking him-alienation, indifference.

    Without a sense of equality, one will judge and compare, and often fall into inner anxiety, jealousy, low self-esteem, and self-doubt.

    If you want to cover up this part, you will project it on your partner, dislike your partner, lack respect, and even be promiscuous.

    Intimacy will be like a microscope, showing your depression, lack, fear, clinging

    What you hide and don't want to face in your daily life with various skills will be fully and accurately presented.

    Because of this kind of long-term, zero-distance relationship 24 hours a day, the bottom of the heart will inevitably be fully exposed to the other person.

    This is why so many people who may have achieved something in the secular world are most likely to experience frustration in intimate relationships;

    Friends who only see each other for dinner, wine, and tea every few weeks or months think you are good, but only your partner (or children) can always see through your most hidden weaknesses.

    They can always easily say a word to poke your pain.  That's what intimacy is all about, it leaves you with nowhere to hide.

    This really makes many people who are used to living in the social image extremely panic, because even they themselves are not sure, once the things that have been suppressed in their hearts for many years are revealed, what kind of horror will it be?  All ruined?

    So, that's why people feel alone, not understood, not understood, worn out, longing to connect with someone, to be intimate, but to be able to, and yet terrified to death.

    In fact, the final alienation and failure of many people's intimate relationships are all caused by themselves.

    Did you make it yourself?  It seems so, without Xiaoqi, what happened today would not have happened.

    Psychology says that people are born to learn to separate.  The reason for this is entirely because I still can't "get rid of" my mother's control.

    Think carefully, a person's life is a life of constant separation.

    Before the moment it was born, a newborn baby has already experienced the first extremely painful separation-leaving the mother's extremely comfortable womb, being squeezed into the world from the narrow space, the cold wind, the noisy voice, and the pain he just experienced made him cry bitterly.

    But the baby still thinks that his mother and himself are one at first. When he is hungry, his mother will feed him. When he is cold, his mother will hold him tightly in his arms

    A dedicated mother is extremely sensitive. She really feels what he feels, what he thinks, and what he needs, the mother will satisfy him immediately.

    But soon, the baby realizes that he and his mother are two people, and this psychological separation is more painful than the childbirth process.

    Toddlers discover that they can't command the world, or even their mother, and cry constantly.

    Slowly, they start to accept the concept of "Mom is Mom and I am me".  However, they still can't accept the fact that their mother will leave themselves to work, to study, to these facts.

    Every separation from mom and significant other is painful, and each leaves toddlers worrying about being abandoned.

    Next, they had to go out into the world alone without their mother and relatives, which was a long and painful process.

    When the kindergarten class starts, the children who leave home completely for the first time always cry together.  Crying is because of distress, because of the real pain caused by separation.

    After that, there are elementary school, junior high school, high school Finally, the children leave home completely.  Later, the children began to form their own homes.  Later, when the children have their own children, the children must personally teach their children to experience separation and learn to separate.

    No matter how much separation hurts, we must do it because-separation and love are equally important, they are the two most important themes in life, they work together to make a person grow, let a person be himself.

    Thinking of this, Chu Lihua called Qing Yunfei.

    Telephone.  It was connected quickly.

    ——"It's very unsafe outside now, I'm worried about you."

    ——"I thought, you didn't plan to let me go back, and you ignored me for so many days."

    Qing Yunfei's tone was full of resentment.

    ——"I've been waiting at home for your return. I thought you would come back by yourself."

    Chu Lihua felt sour in her heart.

    ——"I thought you would call me when it was dark. You used to always miss me when it was dark. Now, I have less and less place in your heart." (Remember this site  URL: www.hlnovel.com
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