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unreachable loss

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    ?

    I remember that in the Spring Festival of 2014, I sent big red envelopes of the same amount to each of the four CEOs. The purpose is to hope that they will accept it, and then settle the wages owed to me and my colleagues.  Then they didn't dare to accept any of them, and they didn't want to accept my blessing. Maybe they seemed like they couldn't accept a penny.  Such a huge company, with such a few bosses, none of them are willing to stand up and solve the problem. It's strange if it doesn't collapse, and then it really collapsed.  Then conclude, the pattern is the human heart and human nature.  But in fact, what I want to say is that if they settled the settlement at that time, there will be no change for me now. I still can¡¯t buy the Batman I have always liked today, even with the inexplicable thing of 6.18 discount.  Just like people who have been far away from my heart, even if they barely maintain dispensable connections, for me, it doesn't matter whether there is or is not, Amitabha, oh, I will go, can I become a philosopher.  ¡ª¡ªObserve things and then learn

    In the past two years, I have had a very strong idea, and every time I think about it, I feel like dying.  What kind of idea is it that if you are not crazy, you will not survive?  Please allow me to make a joke first, let us discuss other related topics first.

    Why do you suddenly feel depressed when you are walking on the street and watching people coming and going, and suddenly feel that you have fallen into an unknown abyss?  Do you suddenly feel that life is really meaningless?  Do you feel that your whole life, your whole life, is for some kind of predestined search, so you search hard, you run around, sometimes looking up at the stars in humility, and sometimes gulping down the glass angrily  The wine in the cup, and then a kind of inexplicable emotion arises out of the unknown, which is silent to the surrounding, but to yourself, it is like a volcanic eruption, and you even want to kill yourself from the world.

    I often feel that my blood is full of enthusiasm, but it all flows into the prison of silence after silence. The irony is that this prison is built by myself.

    When you close your eyes and meditate, and suddenly feel the sorrow of life, what do you want to do most?  Maybe you light a cigarette and aimlessly plunge yourself into deeper confusion; maybe you meet three or five friends and drink alcohol for fun;  My own emptiness is perfectly released; or maybe I bought a plane ticket to fly to another place that others are tired of, allowing myself to re-understand the world in a very formal way, and then suddenly discover some artificial beauty; more likely  Roaring songs all night to the screen, so that I can get tired into sleepy dreams.  Xu didn't know the way ahead, so he often avoided it, but when he looked back, he found that he had lived a fake past.

    After being tired, I finally calmed down. My body seemed to be hollowed out by all these things. Looking at the deep sky, only my uneasy heart was still trembling. How should I spend this only time?  the rest of my life?  I opened the movie-watching software and bought a late-night movie ticket. It seems that only the big empty room can tolerate the hatred emanating from my body and the unreachable feeling in my heart.  And buried deep in the heart of the loss.  I looked at it, and the software showed that I had watched sixty-six movies in the past year, but I knew that about sixty of them were late-night shows that I watched alone. Deep in my heart, I thought that this time  The place is able to give me a perfect comfort.

    My parents never knew philosophy, but I learned a word from them: what kind of path you take, what kind of life you live, and what kind of person you are, all depend on your own choice.

    After his father and mother divorced, he worked hard on the ground, earning money to pay off his gambling debts every day. Every time he went to see him, his eyes had a kind of deep regret.  He said that he had gone the wrong way before, and now he will make up for it.  As for the mother, she chose a person who might die and go back to the mountains and forests.  I never thought that my mother could be content with poverty. She was competitive all her life and wanted to be better than others in everything. I remember that I said that I might spend my whole life working hard, but I may not be the kind of competitive and promising she said.  My child, at that time she scolded me bloody.  Now, when I went to the place where she was, I was surprised to find that she had a vague mood of being exiled to the world.

    They all have their own choices, and I often look at the road ahead, imagining which one I am walking on among the thousands of roads.

    "You should be a hero in life, and you should be a hero in death."

    Remembering the words of pride sighed by such a weak woman like Li Qingzhao, I suddenly felt full of joy.  To be alive is to be a hero among people, and to be a hero among ghosts after death. It has nothing to do with fame and fortune, but just to give life an explanation.  How many people are not as good as such a passionate woman who writes.  Is it pathetic?

    ? When I was struggling to survive in Wuhan in 2014, I just wanted to do something that would make me feel meaningful. After returning to Chengdu, I went here and there, and finally made it into the scarred appearance I am now.  2017 New Year's Eve and ?A friend drank a lot of wine, and ended up laughing all the way home. Reflecting on his own behavior, it was really because of self-deprecation that he couldn't ask for some things he wanted.  To this day, that laughter still rings in my ears.

    I think again of Zhimo's words: I taste the essence of my soul to condense it into an ideal pearl, which contains my passionate efforts to illuminate my profound spiritual palace.

    These days I have been going crazy, and I plan to gather a group of people next year to plan and succeed.  Then I couldn't sleep all night and night, silently planning the path I chose in my heart.  I only hope to find the fate, luck, life, and death of this life in this way.

    You probably also have the same idea. Looking at the time in a hurry, you always feel that life should not be like it is now.

    If one day you wake up and see the sleeping person next to you, and suddenly feel that you are too strange, will you feel scared at this time; if one day you dare not face the bleak life, and end up doing nothing, will you be in pain?  ?

    Yu Jian can fly to Tathagata Peak, with a thousand smiles!  To encourage each other.  (Remember the site URL: www.hlnovel.com
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