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nora on the plain

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    ?

    Nora on the plain

    "However, since Nora is awake, it is not easy to return to the dream state, so I have to go"

    ¡ª¡ªLu Xun's "What Happened After Nora Left"

    Text£üAn Xiaoqing

    Editor£üJin Tong

    Picture£üAn Xiaoqing (except signature)

    missing woman

    Zhang Yue has been waiting for a call from a woman.  Almost ten years later, that number has not been called again.

    The first time I received a call from a woman was in the distant fall of 2001.  Back then, the world was still in the afterglow of millennial optimism and romance.  That was the sixth year of the "Half the Sky" program, and the tenth year of the woman's marriage.

    ?Deep in the Guanzhong Plain, 1,100 kilometers away from Beijing, the call was dialed from a brand-new red brick courtyard, and was picked up by Wang Jun, the planner of the "Half the Sky" program group.  In the past half a year, this rural woman wrote several long letters to the program group.  In one of the letters, she wrote:

    "In the countryside, if you have money, you can build a house, but you can't buy books; you can play cards and chat, but you can't go to Xi'an. You can't socialize, you can't be too flamboyant, you can't be too personal, you can't be too good, and you can't be too bad. There are conventional rules.  If you want to break it, you will feel helpless, hopeless, and alone, as if there are many eyes on you. You don¡¯t need others to stop you, you will voluntarily follow these rules.¡±

    Wang Jun was amazed by this letter.  With this letter in his pocket, he was excited in the office, reading it when he saw everyone.  In yet another letter, the woman described where she lived:

    "In summer, there are endless golden wheat waves, and in autumn, there are cornfields like green gauze curtains But I just don't like this place, because it is too flat."

    The letters and phone calls from the strange woman in Pingyuan shocked everyone in the program group.  In the first few years after the birth of "Half the Sky", the audience saw mostly the stories of urban women, and rarely heard the voices of women from villages and frontiers.  What women write in their letters is also very different from the mainstream narrative of rural women in the past.

    "Half the Sky" host Zhang Yue and his colleagues sensitively grasped this voice.  On March 23, 2002, "My name is Liu Xiaoyang" was broadcast on the weekend edition of "Half the Sky".  That was the first time the audience heard the inner cries of an ordinary rural woman on the platform of national television.

    In the blizzard and snow in winter in the Northland, Liu Xiaomian was wearing a bright red coat, sitting between the gray and yellow fields and fields, and told Zhang Yue her many dissatisfaction with life and the world she lived in.

    "Everyone thinks farmers, especially women, don't need to think. She cooks, she does laundry, she looks after children, she does housework, she does field work. Then she goes shopping, she  That's all, what kind of thinking do you have to do these things, she doesn't need to have thinking."  Liu Xiaomian gritted his teeth, "I don't accept this."

    "I would rather be miserable, I don't want to be numb, I don't want me to know nothing, and then I'm satisfied. It's good to have food, clothing, and housing. I don't satisfy these, I want  A fulfilling life, I want knowledge, I want to read, I want to watch TV and get what I want from TV - because I can't go out."

    Everyone who has watched that episode remembers the man in the TV, who always raised his chin slightly, made a gesture of disobedience, and the skin on the cheekbones was red, as if he was suffering from a high fever.  woman.

    In the northern plains at the beginning of the new century, the most dense core area of ??traditional Chinese farming civilization, what Liu Xiaomian endured was "a strange throbbing, a feeling of unwillingness, and a longing".

    This kind of throbbing and longing from women first attracted the attention of the world in the United States in the middle of the 20th century.  In the book "The Feminine Mystique", the writer Betty Friedan pierces the myth of the American suburban housewife shaped and suppressed by the historical and cultural context:

    "She made her bed, she shopped, she picked out the fabric for the sofa covers, she ate peanut butter sandwiches with her kids, she slept with her husband at night, and she didn't even dare to silently ask herself, 'Is this what life is all about?  ?¡±

    Liu Xiaomian, a rural woman from the northern plains of China, uttered the same cry and unwillingness half a century later.

    This is not just a rural topic, or a female topic.  Through the barriers of gender, region, and class, Liu Xiaoyang's expression is an expression of the essence of "humanity".  In this sense, Zhang Yue feels that "Liu Xiaomian is not only herself, but also each of us¡ªshe is "one person", and at the same time she is also the whole world."

    Therefore, "My Name is Liu Xiaoyan" became the most famous and far-reaching episode of "Half the Sky".  The name "Liu Xiaoyang" came out of the northern plains and became a code in the hearts of audiences of different generations. In the following two decades, it has continuously aroused recognition and echo.??¡±.  Now, she doesn't feel like she's inside, she feels like she's on the sidelines, between the inside and the outside.

    On the side is her little garden.  In the garden, she talked to herself.  For a long time, the matter of "thinking blindly" has been very important to her life.

    20 years ago, at the end of "My Name is Liu Xiaoyan", she said with despair and unwillingness, "I just don't want to close this window. I keep it open until I am old. I am afraid that I will lose those windows.  Passion, afraid that I will lose those touches.¡±

    Now, she is really old.  The window in the living room is always open for Ponyo the cat.

    In the small garden outside the window, cockscombs are in full bloom.  She said that in the future, she will accept as much as the little garden gives her.  When the flowers bloom well, she shows off to everyone, saying, my flowers bloom well.  The daughter made fun of her, and talked about my flowers all day long, as if there were so many flowers.

    The last time we talked, it was in the kitchen.  That evening, there was sleet on the plain.  I asked Liu Xiaoyan, do you sometimes think this is a tragedy?

    She fell silent.  Skylight streams in through the skylight overhead.  The kitchen is almost the same as it was twenty years ago.  Only the firewood stove was abandoned and replaced by an induction cooker.  Cupboards, water tanks, kitchen knives, and a large wooden basin for steaming steamed buns were all prepared by her mother-in-law when Liu Xiaomian married here in 1991.

    "I don't think it's a tragedy. There may be many people like me, but we don't know. Even if it happens to someone else, it can't be called a tragedy. I don't reciprocate sympathy, pity or anything, I may just appreciate it  "Liu Xiaomian thinks that the best way to describe it is "tragic".

    "I think it is a tragic thing. A tragic thing has its own beauty in it." (Remember the website website: www.hlnovel.com
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