The wind outside the window kept blowing the curtains, like black shadows hovering outside.
Under the night, who is standing outside the window?
Perhaps,
Most people had this kind of speculation when they were young, and they also had similar doubts.
Zhu Shengnan lay on the bed with his eyes open.
She has her own separate room,
own big bed,
own wardrobe,
own dresser,
she has,
A home in very good condition.
In the whole of China, the number of women named Sheng Nan is surprisingly large.
Parents themselves may not think so,
But this name itself carries a kind of depression, even the owner who wears this name will subconsciously hate his own name.
As if one's own birth, as one's own sex,
For my parents' family,
It is a kind of helplessness,
It is a sigh of resignation,
want a son,
but gave birth to a daughter,
In desperation, I named him "Katsuo",
It can be regarded as a kind of "self-deception" of parents and parents.
Human beings, because of the construction of ethics and morality, can distinguish themselves from animals and slowly separate themselves from the sequence of all things;
But everything has two sides, and the distortion of ethics and morality often becomes a side effect and starts to harm human beings themselves.
It's five o'clock in the morning,
Zhu Shengnan woke up early,
But I don't know what to do.
She is six years old this year, and was originally at the age of kindergarten, but her family did not let her go to kindergarten, but hired a private teacher to teach her at home.
She didn't resist, and she didn't know how to resist.
Can't sleep, and it's still dark,
She won't be noisy, and she won't make trouble,
She has a home,
But in this home, the light color is a bit dark.
She didn't know what she could do at this point,
watch TV?
read comics?
Go to your parents' room, get into their bed and act like a baby?
She just leaned against the head of the bed, sitting, always, sitting.
Sit until the sky begins to light up.
Downstairs, there were footsteps. It should be that my grandma got up and was preparing breakfast for the family.
She also got up,
wear clothes,
wash up,
After tidying up myself,
Slowly walked downstairs.
"Katsuo, come, let's eat."
"Okay, Grandma."
Katsuo did not sit at the table,
Instead, he stood at the door of the small room at the corner of the living room.
Grandma came up with a tray. On the tray, there were porridge and bowls and chopsticks.
The so-called meal,
Not calling her granddaughter to have breakfast together,
It doesn't matter if people eat or not, and it doesn't matter if people are hungry or not.
A Bodhisattva must never be in debt.
Grandma carefully put the tribute food on and arranged it, then knelt down on the futon in front and kowtowed reverently.
In Zhu Shengnan's memory, grandma didn't believe in Buddhism. I don't know when she started to believe in it.
After kneeling down,
Grandma stood up, stretched out her hand, and grabbed Zhu Shengnan's wrist.
The needle was taken out by grandma, and it was stuck in Zhu Shengnan's arm, and half of the blood was drawn.
Immediately afterwards, grandma poured her granddaughter's blood into the wick.
Zhu Shengnan didn't know where grandma learned this method, but she liked it very much, because compared with drawing blood, other methods would make her feel more uncomfortable.
Grandma knelt down again, and she began to bow again, but this time, she bowed to the painting under the altar.
In the picture,
There are two ghost messengers, and a male doll in front.
Grandma prayed with words in her mouth, extremely pious.
Zhu Shengnan looked at the painting. She had seen this painting countless times.
&on.
Zhu Shengnan's body trembled slightly, he didn't cry out for pain, and even ignored it.
Mom did it on purpose,
she knows,
Mom doesn't like herself, hates herself.
She felt that Zhu Shengnan was the culprit who caused her family to be like this.
If she is a boy, mother still has a happy family.
"This broom boy, he gets angry when he sees it!"
Mom picked up the chopsticks and slapped them at Zhu Shengnan.
Zhu Shengnan just sat there, not moving, letting her smoke.
smoke it,
Although chopsticks hurt my body,
But compared to scraping yourself with cigarette butts, scissors, and a knife,
Even if it's nothing.
Grandma just sat there, quietly chewing the steamed buns in her mouth,
Grandma at this time,
Just like Jia Mu in the Dream of the Red Chamber,
High above, watching the fights below.
The breakfast is over,
Mom went upstairs again, and suffered three consecutive miscarriages, which made her unable to continue to conceive, and also suffered a huge blow to her spirit. She shut herself at home all day.
And she knew it herself,
her husband,
Still for a boy,
outside,
On other women,
? Working hard.
When people watch TV dramas, they often feel absurd, and always feel that such things cannot happen in reality.
But actually,
The stories that happen in reality are often more like TV dramas than TV dramas.
Many lower limits of human beings are more terrifying than the madness of artists.
The private teacher is here,
daytime,
Just go to class.
When the night comes,
The private teacher is gone,
Grandma called her:
"time for dinner."
Zhu Shengnan came down, and she stood obediently at the door of the small room.
Grandma opened the door and walked in with her.
A blade appeared in Grandma's hand,
She took off her clothes.
There was another wound on his body, and blood began to flow out.
Grandma knelt on the ground and began to cry, holding her and crying.
"My poor granddaughter,
God, open your eyes,
My poor granddaughter,
My darling baby"
Grandma often cries,
She felt that by crying, she could move the Bodhisattva and the two people in the animation.
It's like crying at a funeral in a rural area. The sisters-in-law who were talking and laughing before entering the house will cry "earth-shattering" immediately. Grandma has also inherited this skill.
She said that Bodhisattva has a lot of things to do, if you don't shout louder, she can't hear clearly.
If she can't hear clearly, she won't talk to you.
Zhu Shengnan looked at his grandma who was kneeling on the ground hugging him,
He looked ahead again.
Suddenly,
She saw the two people in the painting, as if they moved a little bit, yes, they moved a little bit.
One of them seemed to be still smiling at himself.
She immediately shouted:
"Grandma, the people in the painting are moving."
She is happy,
Even excited.
Perhaps,
When the business of father and grandma is done,
Can I get rid of this numb life myself?
The hardest thing to extinguish and kill is often fantasy.
"Snapped!"
Grandma smacked Zhu Shengnan's face,
scolded:
"You son of a bitch, who are you kidding, what nonsense are you talking about!" (Remember the website URL: www.hlnovel.com