At the tripartite roundtable meeting in 2212, the leaders of mutants, intelligent robots, and aliens held a heartbreaking and tearful closed-door meeting of accusations.
The leader of the mutants rubbed his red eyes and said dejectedly: "I can't stand it anymore! Let's find a way to get him away quickly. Just because he cheated, I won 20 cards in a row on Pai Gow last night. , I fell into his trap as soon as I got angry and defrauded me of my national treasure, the mutant crystal. The most hateful thing is that I couldn¡¯t figure out how he was a swindler!"
"Me too. Last month, he came to my place to eat and take away. Before leaving, he defrauded me of 100 carloads of rare earths, and then sold them to a second-hand dealer. That time he smashed them." The infrared eyes of the robot leader It's almost turning green, he said with lingering fear. He felt heartbroken when he thought of the 100 carloads of rare earths. How many precious metals can be refined and how many robots can be built!
"Don't mention it anymore. I'm not as miserable as your little things. My wife has been fucked by him." The alien leader raised his huge head sadly, trying not to let tears flow out of his fist-sized eyes, and then Said: "Because he thought our aliens looked strange and wanted to try something new, so he tried to take a bunch of photos of me and my mistress, and threatened my wife to publish them. My wife went to him and was "
"Alas! What a waste~~" The leader of mutants and robots looked at the alien leader with pity, sighed, and shook his head helplessly.
"So we must unite and find a way to drive away this plague god. But we can't let him know that we did it!"
"Yes, but this needs to be done in a sincere and reliable manner."
"I'm looking for someone with a fresh face and a more honest look. This guy has really bad eyes!"
"This guy is not easy to fool. It will be hard for him to find out what we are doing!"
"Yes, yes~~" All three of them felt the same way and were very sad.
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At noon, in a neglected jungle area, groups of mutant gangsters, robot hooligans and alien scum were trading drugs, rare earths, and medicines, and the sound of gunfire was heard from time to time nearby.
Under a small tree in the middle of a three-way intersection, Wu Xiaobao was waving a cattail leaf fan, wearing shorts and a bare back, lying on a bamboo deck chair to enjoy the cool air. His eyes were slightly narrowed, and he had a handsome face with sharp edges. He also had a pair of flip-flops on his feet, looking like he loved and disdained everyone. When those gangsters saw him from afar, they hurriedly took a detour as if they were encountering the god of plague.
In this era, Earth's science and technology is highly developed, and humans on Earth have already fully evolved into mutants with powerful abilities. Together with aliens and intelligent robots, they form the most influential tripartite force.
And Wu Xiaobao is the only human being who is unwilling to evolve into a mutant. It's not that he doesn't want to, but that he is too lazy to evolve any superpowers, such as telepathy, invisibility, clairvoyance, and flying around. He thinks it is purely unnecessary.
He also evolves, but he spends most of his time evolving his brain. In his eyes, a smart brain is enough. Superpowers are of no use! Now, don't those people still hide away when they see me?
At this moment, he was playing with the mutant crystal he had won from the leader of the mutants. It was the size of a thumb and was crystal clear. He originally wanted to crunch it, chew it up and eat it to nourish his kidneys, but then he thought about it, why not sell it? Wouldn¡¯t it be worth it? I don¡¯t have enough money, hey~~hehe~~~. Thinking of the good thing he did last night, he closed his eyes proudly and hummed a yd tune.
The sky was getting dark, and a man in gray robe slowly walked up from a distance. He had a bare head, lowered his eyebrows, and looked compassionate. He was holding an alms bowl in his hand. He looked like an eminent monk. Wu Xiaobao shook the cattail leaf fan with one hand and glanced at the monk from a distance. With the other hand, he subconsciously stuffed the mutant crystal into his crotch, and then continued to close his eyes and meditate.
The monk came to Wu Xiaobao, looked at him carefully, clasped his hands together, and said: "Anita Buddha, this benefactor, I see that you have a handsome face and a full heaven, but the hall is dark, and it seems that you are facing bad luck. I can resolve it for you."
Wu Xiaobao squinted his eyes and heard the words of the Buddha in his ears. He reluctantly opened his eyes a little, glanced up and down at this person, snorted in his nose, refused to open his mouth, and frowned. Moved his tongue:
"Shit, do you think you shaved your head, held a broken bowl, and said a few words about Buddha, and I don't know which rock you jumped out of? The young master came out to fool around. When I was a kid, the first time I swindled money was by pretending to be a beggar. Do you think I don¡¯t know what you want to do? It was that mutant bastard who asked you to fool me. Didn¡¯t you just want to get his broken crystal back? It¡¯s so stupid. What kind of magician are you pretending to be! As soon as you stick your butt out, I will know what shit you are doing! Go back and tell him, don¡¯t bother me if you have nothing to do, otherwise I will tell all his scandals.?Come out. roll! "
After he finished speaking, he took a breath, turned around lazily, and closed his eyes again.
The monk broke into a cold sweat when he heard this, and said quickly: "The donor is not an ordinary person. Remember, don't be greedy, so that you can keep your life safe!"
"Fuck! A dog's mouth can't spit out ivory, and a Buddha's mouth can't spit out a piece of meat! I don't know if I'm a mortal, but I know you are a real or fake god! You can only survive by jumping on a big rope. Half-immortal, why are you pretending to be Tathagata Buddha? You think I am Sun Monkey! The scar on your head must have been permed last night. The two holes in your clothes were also just torn off. Your face is white but rosy, and you smell like oil. , just finished eating big fish and meat, right?! And that broken bowl, the crack is still shiny, please! Even if you are cheating, you should be a little more careful! Don¡¯t be greedy, Nima! If you can¡¯t deceive me, just use human nature. Come hit me, bah! I'm not greedy, I eat and drink whatever I want! I can't be like you bald donkeys, just go around begging for food with a broken bowl! If you don't get out, I will close the door and let the dogs out!"
The monk suddenly became disgraced, with patches of red and purple on his face. He wiped the cold sweat with his hand, and then said:
"Donor, seeing that you are a destined person, I will give you a treasure that can keep you safe at critical moments."
After speaking, the monk took out a flat yellow box from his arms and handed it to Wu Xiaobao's hand.
"Don't do this! You think that if you give me a piece of junk that I picked up from some garbage dump, I will be grateful and return the crystal to you, right? You hit the wrong person. What a stupid plan in a dog's belly. You don't prick up your donkey ears and ask around. Can the young master give you enlightenment at will? Such a big-ass object can exchange the crystal from my hand, you The bald donkey's head was squeezed by the door!"
"Oh, please take care of yourself, donor. Do not open this treasure unless absolutely necessary. Remember this!" The monk said feebly, feeling a little regretful that he should not provoke this guy.
Wu Xiaobao glanced at the box from the corner of his eye, weighed it, lay down lazily on the chair, closed his eyes and continued to curse: "Hey, it's just such a yellow, dirty, scummy thing, don't let it go." I'll open it and tell me what your intentions are. If I believe you, a half-hearted bastard who lives in a temple, then I'll be kicked in the head by a donkey!"
After Wu Xiaobao finished scolding, why did he feel so quiet, huh? When he opened his eyes, he saw that the surroundings were empty and the monk had long since disappeared. Sitting up from the recliner, Wu Xiaobao turned around and looked around, but could not find the monk anywhere. Suddenly he bent over and looked under the recliner, but there was nothing there. He couldn't help but cursed in his heart: "Damn it! Not even a fart." You just ran away, do you know the etiquette? Is this what Buddha usually taught you? Have you had any training? What kind of quality do you have!"
He took the flat box and looked around. The outer packaging looked very sturdy. He shook it, but there was no sound. He thought to himself, what is inside, and it is not allowed to be opened? What kind of bullshit should be opened at critical moments? Rules are meant to be broken! What if you open it and take a look? Can't you die? no! I had to see what Bald Donkey put in there. Humph, even if you bald ass wants to trick me, I¡¯m not afraid of you. I¡¯ve never seen anything. The smart robots are trying to kill me all day long. I¡¯m still alive and well. Well, there are also those unreliable aliens. His grandma only has a brain and a body that can catch up to the airport. She thought that if she gave the little grandfather some meat to taste, he would let him go. I will kill that alien sooner or later. Let everyone take a look at the virtues of the group. By the way, there is also that mutant bastard who just wanted to pay off the debt by giving me a crystal that I don¡¯t know why. Forget it this time, the young master must make him spit out hundreds of thousands of taels of gold next time. .
Wu Xiaobao was still hesitating whether to open it or not. He estimated that there was a high probability that this was a trap set by the evil guy, and knowing that he couldn't control his curiosity, he would definitely open it and take a look.
Finally, he cursed secretly, these animals! You guys are so ruthless, you are pretending to be a ghost, you know that the young master wants to open it and take a look even though he knows he has been deceived, but you are also very mean, curiosity killed the cat~~~.
As soon as he closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, Wu Xiaobao opened the box with his hands. After a long pause with no movement, he finally opened his eyes a crack.