2. Feeling lost and feeling inferior, I blame others.
"Yulan, before I wrote this letter, I thought repeatedly whether to use the Internet to send emails or use the traditional method to try writing. After much deliberation, it is better to use the traditional method to try writing. Because people nowadays rarely use the traditional method to write letters. Typing on the keyboard is indeed convenient, fast and trouble-free, but there are also times when it is inconvenient. For example, the keyboard is all in English, which is too Westernized and does not have the flavor of Chinese culture. This is a bit foreign to China for a huge country. Computers In the eyes of the Chinese people, it is a bad habit that is confusing and ineffective.
"This August 1st Army Day, I am going to visit the families of the martyrs again. I mentioned before that the two families of the martyrs, Liu Shida and Guan Xiuying, are lonely and vulnerable elderly people in our unit. The leaders of the unit attach great importance to them, and the superior authorities attach great importance to them. I am Renhua Trading. Chairman of the company's labor union, every year on Army Day, the company organizes personnel to visit demobilized personnel and family members of martyrs. This year is the celebration of the 50th anniversary of Army Day. The celebrations are warm, the work area is wide, and there are many people. Therefore, We were divided into two groups, Group A and Group B. I was the leader of Group A, and the deputy leader was a section chief of the Civil Affairs Bureau, as well as a female war reporter and two other team members from the company.
"According to the situation, our main work is to care about and express condolences to the families of martyrs. Especially in recent years, the lives of the families of martyrs have been very difficult and they have become a vulnerable group in society. Although they have the care of governments at all levels; there are union organizations in their units Help, but compared with social development, it is still a blind spot. There is sunshine but not brightness, and there is care but no guarantee. For more than 30 years of reform and opening up, the social economy has developed rapidly, and the country¡¯s economic cake has become bigger and bigger; China¡¯s wealth is controlled In the hands of a few people, most people do not live a wealthy life. In addition, during the reform and opening up, a large number of vulnerable groups have accumulated due to various hardships; poor families, subsistence allowance households, people who have gone bankrupt in enterprise reform, and farmers who have lost their land. These people are the army of poverty in the new era. The greatest sorrow brought to the nation by the so-called mobilization system is that the country is rich and the people are poor. However, with the rapid expansion of crony capitalism and new capitalism, in the near future, new consortia will gradually form to dominate one side and promote the redevelopment of society. layout situation.
"The first stop we went to was the home of the revolutionary martyr Liu Feng. His father, Liu Shida, is 69 years old and is not in good health. He lives in a renovated house from his work unit. According to current standards, it is a quasi-dangerous house that is about to be renovated. The house is not wide, with a living room and a living room less than 30 square meters. There is no decent furniture in the house. There is an old wooden bed, a two-door wooden wardrobe that is both a wardrobe and a grocery cabinet. There is also an old dining table and three There are four horse frames and wooden stools; he is alone and has no one to rely on. The Civil Affairs Bureau and the work union are his relatives.
"You are Chairman Guo." Liu Shida didn't speak fluently, but his eyes were good.
"Old man, are you feeling well?" Guo Xiaoming held the hands of the family members of the martyrs, as enthusiastic as family members: "He is the section chief of the Civil Affairs Bureau, and she is Wei Yafei, the military and civilian reporter."
The other two team members are volunteers.
"Well, well, okay, thank you to the government." Liu Shida has gray hair, a sallow face full of wrinkles, a pair of presbyopic eyes that have lost their former vitality, and his thin, one-armed body is like a stick. The burned out candle sometimes extinguishes the bright light and sometimes burns.
"Master Liu, do you still have Liu Feng's photos?" Wei Yafei's task is to collect materials about martyrs, do a good job in publicity work for the families of martyrs, and let the whole society care and help them.
Liu Shida put a shabby cloth bag, wrapped it again and again with red cloth, tied it up again, and took out a photo that was scorched by the fire and smoke as if he were protecting a treasure: "This half of the photo was left by Liu Feng Captain He couldn't believe it when he handed it over to me. Even the bones were not found when cleaning the battlefield. The soil on the battlefield was stained red with blood and was burnt. There was only half a burnt photo with the blood stains of the martyrs on it. It¡¯s vague.¡±
"Doesn't martyr Liu Feng have other relics? For example, photos before he joined the army, certificates he received when he was in school, and items he used at home." Wei Yafei seemed to be looking for the footprints of the martyr, praising heroes and advocating justice.
Liu Shida¡¯s ears were not good, so he understood what reporter Wei meant only after Guo Xiaoming¡¯s explanation. Over the years, the things my son used in the past were thrown around, including books, exercise books, his favorite picture albums, and the newspapers and magazines he read, all of which were sold as scrap to small merchants who collected scraps. In his memory, he finally found a certificate for Liu Feng's three best students in a tattered old wooden box, as well as a high school graduation photo and the pen he used in middle school. The most memorable thing is the photo taken with the classmates before joining the army. Four classmates went to different units back then, and two of them are still alive today: "This is Liu Feng, and the three next to him are his classmates. Among them are One of them went to Ningbo, and the other went to the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau."
"Master Liu, these things are too precious. They are the only relics left by the martyrs." Wei Yafei was indescribably happy, so she said: "Seeing these relics of Liu Feng, it seems as if he is right beside us. He is a living person, living alongside us.??Fight. Master Liu, Liu Feng is not only your son, he is also the son of all Chinese people, and is an example for all military cadres and soldiers to learn from. "
Liu Shida's face was filled with tears. They were tears of grief, late tears, and tears of happiness. They were tears of happiness that his son lived in his heart: "Thank you. Liu Fengfeng will always live in my heart."
"Old man, you have raised a good son. He is not only your glory, but also the glory of the entire Chinese people." Section Chief Duan sent the care of the Civil Affairs Bureau to the families of the martyrs: "Old man, what else do you want?"
Liu Shida said something that brought tears to his eyes. He hesitated and said for a moment: "Is telling lies the truth?"
Guo Xiaoming said half-jokingly: "This time Section Chief Duan came here specifically to understand the situation, as well as reporter Wei. Once her press release was sent out, the situation was different."
Section Chief Duan smiled and said humorously: "The truth. Only listen to the truth, not lies."
"The lives of the martyrs' families were not good, and they were helpless and lonely. The house was a dilapidated building from the 1960s and was not safe." Liu Shida told the truth, and he told the truth.
Next, volunteers and condolences helped Liu Shida clean up. The Civil Affairs Bureau gave condolences money, and Chairman Guo¡¯s representative unit also gave condolences money. These were all recorded by the accompanying reporter Wei Yafei. In interviews, the most common words spoken by the family members of martyrs were ¡®thank you ***, thank you government¡¯. Then he visited the home of Wang Gang, a member of the martyrs Guo Xiaoming was exhausted after a busy day and had to deal with post-discharge work when he returned to the unit.
As the saying goes, it is easy to do other people's work, but it is not the same thing to do your own work. Everything is a dream and a missed opportunity. He almost said to Yulan at the end: "Yulan, I have to tell you, Renhua Trading Company will soon It is about to declare bankruptcy and all employees will be sold off their seniority at once. Now I really feel a sense of crisis. I can¡¯t make up my mind whether to leave or stay. If I leave, I will buy out my seniority. If I want to stay in the company and do post-work, I will sell it. My seniority has been cut off. The manager of the company is willing to let me stay and work with him on post-company affairs, but I haven¡¯t expressed my opinion yet. If I don¡¯t stay in the company and join the society, what can I do? What will I do? I can¡¯t do anything.
"Yulan, now I really feel lost, without direction, without courage. The bigger problem is that without a job, there is no income, and without income, there is no money to pay the mortgage, and there is also a wife and children who need money. This society is too realistic and changing with each passing day. Too fast, the competition becomes more fierce, and if you are not careful, you will fall behind. Now I am a person who has fallen behind. I fell from the sky to the ground all of a sudden, and my body was bruised and painful. My heart hurts, my love hurts, and I still feel hurt. My whole soul hurts."
"Yulan, do you hear me?"
"My godmother wants to listen? You said there was no problem, so why is there a problem now?"
¡°It¡¯s because society has changed so much that we won¡¯t be able to reverse it for a while.¡±
"What should I do? It costs money to buy milk powder for the children, money to pay the mortgage on the house, and money to live."
"Yes, I know all this. If you give me more time, maybe it will be better in the future."
"When is the future? Will the child wait for the future?"
"Don't force me. I'm very tired now. My whole body is about to fall apart. Really, I'm not lying to you?"
"What about me? What should I do? I am responsible for the food and drink of the children, I am responsible for the housework, and I am responsible for the mortgage payment of the house. Aren't I tired?"
"Wife, I'm sorry for you. If I have a chance, I will make it up to you. Maybe there will be a chance, believe me."
"You have said this so many times that my ears are ringing with calluses. What is the result? Nothing is done and nothing is accomplished."
"What do you propose?"
"I have no idea?"
At this time, the phone rang, and he woke up from his confused thoughts. It was already dark and the office building was empty. If at this time in the past, the building seemed lively with people coming and going, it seems that people are more prosperous in times of prosperity, and people are dispersed in times of decline. Guo Xiaoming walked towards the dormitory. He didn't know what he would face tomorrow.