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    I have been home alone all day today. In order not to disturb me, my wife took the children out to attend a class reunion early in the morning.  However, I just can¡¯t continue writing. I haven¡¯t even had breakfast yet. There may be too much on my mind and I can¡¯t eat. I just feel a little hungry.  "I really feel out of shape today. In fact, I was in this state yesterday. It's better not to write a chapter if I can barely scrape together the words.  The most important thing is psychological problems and confusion.  "Am I suitable for online writing? Should I continue on this path?"  This issue has been lingering for a long time.  Over the years, part-time writing has gone beyond the scope of a simple "hobby". Financial gains are indeed the main motivation to support it. It is precisely because of this mixed feeling of vanity and responsibility that I squeeze all my time into it after get off work every day. On the Internet.  It must be updated every day. The more updates, the better. This is the current model of online articles. Those with few updates will basically not be successful. Speed ??even overrides quality. Sometimes in order to complete the update volume or get the corresponding perfect attendance award, you can only add water.  , I have also read some books, which contain tens of thousands of words and have no actual content.  This is not about firing map cannons or targeting anyone. I have this kind of helplessness myself.  I'm a handicapped person, so I write slowly no matter how much I think about it. I work a part-time job and have to take care of my family, so I can't speed up at all. Sometimes I can only stay up late even for one chapter.  Not all part-time workers are as slow as me. This is indeed a shortcoming. ????????????????????????????????????? I have made over xx million a year, and I have wonderful prospects such as adapting peripherals and joining the Writers Association. However, the ideal is plump and the reality is skinny. Now I am rushing to buy it, especially this book "Infinite".  The failure cannot be entirely attributed to objective factors such as the downturn in fantasy and rampant piracy. The most critical reason is myself.  Now that I am at the age of four, I must plan for the future.  My health was not good, I had a lot of problems with my coding, and I paid too little attention to my wife and children.  Every day after cooking, I go into my room, close the door, and code. It¡¯s late at night and my wife can¡¯t even say a word.  I usually spend less time with my child. The child is afraid of disturbing me. He wakes up every morning on tiptoe. I don¡¯t dare to speak loudly when I close the door. Even I feel that he is very depressed at home.  Family members are not NPCs. You can complete tasks by spending time with them once or twice. People communicate with each other attentively, especially relatives.  Yesterday I went shopping with my wife I don¡¯t remember how long it has been since I went out with her. Walking on the street, she suddenly said that she didn¡¯t want me to make much money, but just wanted me to be healthy and hold hands until I grow old in peace.  I smiled, but in fact I almost burst into tears.  Now when I type this line, my eyes are red.  After thinking about it today, if I regard codewriting as a part-time career, I have failed miserably; as a family, I have not fulfilled my responsibilities; the only thing left is my hobby. If I create as a hobby, I have basically given up on my hard work.  this road of years.  I don¡¯t feel stuck at all when I write these inner thoughts. What I write in this way can be regarded as real words.  I don¡¯t know what to do. I want to wait for my wife to come back and have a good talk with her. We haven¡¯t sat down to chat alone for a long time.  Then, make a decision.  (To be continued, please search Piaotian Literature. The novels will be better and updated faster!
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