People say that a chance encounter in front of the Buddha five hundred years ago led to our acquaintance in this life.
I can imagine the grand occasion. The CS competition, with Buddha himself as the referee, brings together elites from all over the world. I am the unknown dark horse. Facing countless strong teams, I am not afraid and fight fiercely.
I think I must have lost that time because I couldn¡¯t afford a Logitech or Microsoft mouse and it was difficult for me to fully utilize my skills. Even though even the champion came to talk to me cordially, and even though Buddha was generous with his words of praise and encouragement, I still left everyone behind and hid in a corner.
I must have cried, my tears splashed down in the hall, like precious gems under the light of Buddha.
I didn¡¯t know what I was fighting for. I thought I was fighting for victory, but when victory passed me by, I realized that actually what I was looking forward to was not victory. I think even if I stand on the podium and receive the trophy awarded by Buddha, even if the spotlight and everyone's eyes are focused on me, I will not be happy.
What am I fighting for?
At that time, it must have been like in countless romance movies, a handkerchief was handed over. I just wiped my hazy eyes and even forgot to say thank you to you.
When I looked up and wanted to say thank you, I realized that you had gone far. When you looked back, I only remembered your smile.
I forgot your appearance. For five hundred years, I only remembered your smile in my dreams. Because your smile was so bright, I held my breath for a moment. I thought about it for so long without knowing that it was you at that moment. Your smile dims the Buddha's light, or the Buddha's light becomes more dazzling because of your smile.
It was then that I understood what the Buddha said. Letting everyone play a killing game does not teach people how to kill and be cruel, but allows people to cherish the preciousness of life and understand the fragility of life.
So, games and competitions are not about pursuing victory. I think I must be trying to find your smile from victory. Even though I failed, even though I can only see that dreamlike smile in my dreams.
This dream is five hundred years old.
Finally, the wait has come today. This is an eternal, unforgettable wait. Is happiness waiting? I have no idea. Why does the waiting process never feel long? I just feel that the days of waiting are so happy.
Because there is a dream, there is you in the dream, and there is your smile in the dream.
I still don¡¯t understand why this game makes me so obsessed with it, but I¡¯m never satisfied. I pursue technical excellence, and I practice hard with each gun until I am as familiar with them as I am with my body. I pursue understanding of the map as if I were at home. I can visit every corner of the map with my eyes closed. I pursue victory in games, and I become a nightmare for my opponents in any game.
But why am I never satisfied?
At this time, you came to me.
When you didn¡¯t know how to play games, when you didn¡¯t know the difference between police guns and gangster guns, or the different prices of each gun, you were always by my side, cheering for my success. Sorry for my failure. Day and night, I played games in front of the computer, and you sat quietly and obediently behind me, cheering me on while playing the game, and offering me a drink while I was playing the game.
Every time after a victory, I stretch my tired body and look back at you, you always give me a smile.
That smile has been in my dream for five hundred years! I thought I was already very familiar with it, but today it still looks so dazzling that it even makes me feel warm in my heart, making all my fatigue disappear without a trace.
Later you played with me. Everyone is wondering, how can you, who is so gentle and amiable, play such a violent and boyish game? You always explain with a smile, because I am in the game.
Is it because of me? You also start to pick up an AK47 and kill on various battle networks. What will accompany you is no longer beautiful music and romantic love novels, but fierce gunfire and splattered blood.
When asked if you are happy, you always nod, even though you can¡¯t hide the fatigue in your eyes and heart.
What is the purpose of my game? What is my victory for? What am I trying for? Isn¡¯t it for that smile that has lingered for five hundred years?
I am relieved.
Since then, I have withdrawn from the competition. We often see us building a console for only two people in Internet cafes. When someone is curious to watch our game, they always stop in surprise.
A policeman and a gangster stood side by side in front of the wide snow-covered wall of the snow map, using various guns to carefully and tirelessly type out graphics and words, heart, like, LOVE, love.
Never get tired??
This time, it is not a chance encounter, but an eternal stay together.