When I was in the group, I told my friends more than once that my hands were shaking, my lips were numb, my mind was blank, and I couldn¡¯t remember how to write a thank you speech.
So, let¡¯s start from the blank and leave it at that.
When I started to get into martial arts novels in the second grade of junior high school, except for this, my life was almost blank.
When I started writing novels in my sophomore year, my life was almost blank except for this.
Is it addiction? I thought it might be due to laziness or fear.
My laziness is reflected in my academic skills.
My fear is manifested in human nature.
I don¡¯t want to expand on these things, I just want to say, what makes a lazy guy spend more than ten hours a day lying in front of the computer desk coding? What makes a timid guy go from being autistic in writing to slowly communicating, forming groups, and interacting with others?
I never deny the driving force of money, nor do I deny that writing will give me a sense of superiority among my peers and people of the same class.
But for a young man born in a well-off family, is money more important than playing games and reading novels? What about the wear and tear on health?
?????????????????????? For a sultry man who even has problems with his ability to express himself, what use does the sense of superiority have except for sexual intercourse? What about the comparisons between truly talented people?
So, what I want to say is that I am very tired and I have low self-esteem.
The above seems to be the confession of a pessimist.
But in fact, friends, what I want you to know is that because of writing books, I am very happy; because of writing books, I am also very free and easy.
What I like to do most is to lurk in the book review area, post bar, and QQ group after chapters are updated to watch your discussions on the plot; what I enjoy most is naturally your support and praise.
?????????????????????????????????? In my workplace, I am indifferent to the world and never care about the gains and losses there; on the Internet, I will be depressed by any reader¡¯s criticism, and then I will think about it, or even secretly correct it.
It¡¯s all because of you, my friends,
I am a boring person, I am a clumsy person, I am a vain person, I am an immature person.
Such a guy should have been in trouble everywhere in society, but he is now living so happily - at least in the online world, this is always the case.
This is all because of you, my dear friends.
I wanted to compete for the first place in this "ending month" that was fattened by my broken promises. At the beginning, I was thinking that in the name of the ending month, I might be able to get 6,000 votes, or up to 8,000 votes. In the absence of particularly big competition, you may be able to get a surprise. But within a few days, I knew our competitors for this month
I still remember my wry smile at that time.
But in the early hours of the morning, I was sitting in front of the computer, looking at the messages in the group, on the website, and in the forum. My brain was numb. And, I can say it again, my hands were shaking and my lips were shaking. tingling.
I know that thousands of book friends start from the beginning of the month and work hard all the way to the end of the month. The fund-raising post on Tieba was hanging there, accumulating strength at all times, waiting for the final explosion; and in that 20-minute crazy sprint on the lock screen, we had almost no reference, and it was completely crazy. The crowd became popular. And the final result, let's remember this number:
31145!
And all this is because of mebecause of my works?
¡°Heh, I suddenly realized that what I was saying was quite pretentious.
But I still have to say, friends, maybe you don¡¯t know how a sullen writer expresses his feelings.
In fact, I have already written it in the book: When a person is in the world, he is alone, has a small circle, a large circle, is known or unknown to the world, and the images reflected are different, but relatively speaking, the wider the contact area, the better Your self-understanding will become clearer and clearer.
Yes, friends, in fact, you are my reference and my coordinates. I do not have the ability to easily get ahead in society, let alone the self-consciousness to recognize my true nature, so I can only rely on you and everyone to do my best. Discover as much as possible the essence and meaning of my life.
I have always thought this:
A scholar would die for a confidant, but I would like to live for my readers.
I wrote so much in confusion. There may be typos or unclear meanings. Please forgive me.