Because they didn't have breakfast, the 9th Company entered the stage of exhaustion, sweating profusely, reduced sensory perception, and brain blanks from time to time during the attack. Not only did Cheng Yukun not have breakfast, nor did he eat compressed dry food, he entered the upper state earlier than the soldiers. The real secret why he was able to forget hunger, artillery fire, and minefields and climb up unremittingly was that he had formed a clear belief in his mind. He only had to bring the 9th Company to Ridge No. 1 and to the 632 Highland area to complete the entire mission. He did not understand that the above belief was actually the result of the reduced judgment caused by hunger, which in turn enabled him to regard artillery fire, minefields and even the hunger in his belly with more indifference than ever before. His series of thoughts are: Death is connected with war. If the 9th Company does not fight, of course he will not die; since he will not die, the artillery fire, minefields in front of him, and the hunger in his belly cannot have any effect on him. cause some damages. This kind of thinking seems absurd to ordinary people, but it is very natural in Cheng Yukun's heart. The reduction of his overall mental activity also made him instinctively take the compressed dry food from Urant's hand and start chewing it at some point. He didn't even realize he was eating compressed dry food; he never stopped eating it. It was precisely through this subconscious chewing and eating activity that he gained the physical strength and energy to climb up the No. 1 Ridge ridge ahead of the entire company.
As soon as the cool breeze blew on the mountain ridge, Cheng Yukun recovered most of his senses and perception. The 7th and 8th companies had already left, leaving only a dismounted signal soldier from the battalion headquarters standing on the ridge waiting for them. Seeing him staggering up, the signal soldier took a few steps forward. Raise your hands and salute: "Report to Company Commander Cheng. The battalion commander asked me to stay and convey his message: The deputy commander ordered your company not to delay after coming up. Move forward immediately and speed up to catch up with the team in front!"
The Soviet high-level dual-purpose machine guns on Peak No. 3 of Xilian Mountain were firing fiercely at the large hillside south of Ridge No. 1; the team of the 8th Company had already jumped down a long way. Cheng Yukun clearly realized that a more difficult journey was still ahead! The first people to follow him to the Shanliang Line were not the 1st and 2nd platoons, but the 3rd platoon that was originally at the end of the marching sequence. Cheng Yukun immediately ordered Shang Yujun: "3rd Platoon Commander, now your platoon will serve as the sharp knife platoon: quickly follow up with the 8th company! At the same time, pass the message backward to let the 1st and 2nd platoons speed up!"
Compared with before departure, Shang Yujun's face was paler; due to severe dehydration, the edges and corners on his face also stood out. He seemed to hesitate. But Cheng Yukun's order was immediately carried out.
When Shang Yujun led three platoons to the next Lingnan slope, Liang Tenghui had just been supported by Zhang Wei and walked up the mountain ridge, with a dazed look on his face. Cheng Yukun felt angry again: Look at this instructor, he has to be waited on by himself before he reaches his destination! Without thinking, he loudly said in a complaining voice: "Instructor, what's going on behind you? Why didn't Platoon 1 and Platoon 2 catch up?!"
Liang Tenghui did not answer him. She just raised her eyelids at him as if reflexively. Liang Tenghui hadn't eaten anything in the morning and was feeling empty. He used to be a lawyer and always sat in an office. His physical condition was worse than that of Cheng Yukun. He started to shake after walking for a short time. Zhang Wei also let him eat dry food at first. But he only chewed a few mouthfuls, and his stomach became cramped, so he had to stop eating. Since Liang Tenghui set out, he felt that he had nothing to do with the war. Now that he was exposed to artillery fire and minefields, he gained a metaphysical sense of security; this state did not prevent him from performing his duties on the way. When an artillery shell seriously injured a soldier in the 1st platoon, he could still arrange a stretcher to carry the wounded person off quite clearly. Go further up. This mental state of physical and mental separation was combined with the exhaustion caused by physical exhaustion, making him a dazed person. It was all thanks to the strong Zhang Wei to help him step by step up the mountain ridge of No. 1 Ridge. Cheng Yukun's words finally woke him up, making his semi-conscious and semi-numb consciousness realize that he was on the mountain ridge. But then I looked towards the 632 Highland area in the southeast, and I vaguely thought that the road was still far away. The Soviet troops on Mount Xilian were shooting wildly at the road they must pass, and the god of death was still spreading its black and terrifying wings. Soaring under this sky, Liang Tenghui's true self is no longer willing to return to reality. It has left this war and its own body and gone away! Cheng Yukun didn't hear anything he said in the end, but was surprised to see him walking down the Nanda Slope with Zhang Wei's support, following the third row without stopping on the ridge!
Ever since he witnessed what happened at the edge of the forest during the Soviet shelling in the early morning, Shang Yujun has never been freed from the overwhelming darkness and fear that suddenly broke into his soul at that moment. "Deathyes." Amidst the explosions of shells in the forest, he huddled deep in the cave, staring blankly at the small patch of cave wall in front of him that was constantly vibrating. Feeling a terrifying shiver like a cold snake crawling up the groove of his spine and wrapping around his neck and throat, his consciousness completely froze, leaving only the above thought that frightened him; he already understood the edge of the forest What happened, but I don¡¯t understand, especially I don¡¯t understand how death will happen.?Such a naked and completely unprepared form. It seems that death shouldn't be so sudden, turning a living person into a crater emitting smoke like a thin veil in the blink of an eye. It shouldn't be that simple Yes, it shouldn't be that simple!
"DeathWhat kind of thing is it? Its truth is different from all the concepts, theories, poems, music, paintingsthat I have known in the past to interpret itDeath is just a kind of thing." It is an unpredictable fact that people encounter suddenly and unpreparedly. Death is the end of everything, not only the end of all metaphysical and soul-like existences such as thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc., but also the destruction of the physical body."
His consciousness began to flow, but it was blocked again here. It seemed that someone wanted him to understand more carefully the unique and heavy meaning of the word "destruction". The cold snake moved around his throat, tying his neck tighter and tighter. The darkness in front of his eyes gradually faded. Shang Yujun raised his head and looked out of the cave. The darkness had not completely dissipated. It turned into a gray-black curtain, covering everything in sight. The sky, earth, mountains, rivers, and vegetation that were plundered by artillery fire all took on an uncharacteristically eerie tone. As if in order to understand the full meaning of the word "destruction", his eyes subconsciously turned to the shell crater outside the forest down the slope again. He still didn't see it. All I saw were a few burning bushes on the edge of the pit. The branches of the shrub were black, and the flames that were devouring these branches and leaves were also black. This picture made his heart tremble again, and he suddenly felt more terrifying than the scene of death he had just experienced.
"What happened to me here? Yes, something happened. Because of the crater and those black flames, I suddenly couldn't understand anything. I lost the ability to understand war and death. ." The consciousness became smooth again, but it was blocked again; it became smooth again. It's clogged again.
He encountered something he couldn't understand at all: deathit frightened him. Is this shameful? No. Life is what every grass desires infinitely. Otherwise, whenever the cold winter is gone and early spring comes, they will not hurriedly and joyfully unfold the little bits of green that have been cherished and nurtured in their hearts for a winter, and will not let themselves The flowers bloom in the most beautiful season of life and will not scatter their seeds to the ends of the earth with enthusiasm when the autumn wind blows. Not even an ant wants to die. Therefore, the corpse of ants will also show a painful and ugly posture after death. Man is the spirit of all things. His living space and thinking space are so vast, and his cognitive ability can even reach realms he cannot predict. Every new sunrise, every new landscape - a mountain, a river. . A forest, even a fallen leaf, a drop of water illuminated by the sun, can bring joy and happiness to his life. All year round, he can expect to get joy that is difficult for other creatures to get. In order to make themselves happy, man has created so many civilizational achievements that complement the beauty of nature. As soon as man learned to stand, he began his voyage to conquer the universe. In order to enjoy life, people also make great efforts to control aging. Don't let yourself die prematurely. Humans have astonishingly more things than ants, but they only live once, just like ants. Therefore, death seems particularly terrible and pity to people.
¡°But man also created war.
He continued to think about it, but his consciousness was blocked here, and he came face to face with the dark and terrifying thing that he didn't understand.
Life is what people long for; death is what people hate; but people use war to let others and themselves die. People have created science, invented various machines, and written beautiful poems. Their intelligence should not be so low. But they still have to use war to solve many problems. There must be some deeper, more reasonable, and more powerful reason, a reason that is both sad and helpless. His thinking returned to strict logical deduction; he realized that he had just begun to get rid of the disorder and chaos that the bomb crater had brought to his heart, and was getting closer step by step to understanding the essence of war and the consequences that war brings to soldiers. death. But he couldn't continue thinking. Half an hour after the Soviet shelling, the entire battalion had received the order to attack. Urant called him out of the cave and conveyed the company commander's order, asking him to take the 3rd platoon to assemble outside the forest. Shang Yujun mechanically carried out the company commander's orders, but his inner problems were not solved. On the contrary, he was given a new sense of urgency and heaviness because the company was about to set off for combat.
¡°You might be down before you figure it out!¡± he thought.
Shang Yujun stood on one side of the assembled team and shook his head, trying to wake up from this never-ending dream-like thought. However, he saw the sun through the woods: the sun was also black, with a sun in the center. A black flame that was roiling fiercely; under the sun were the familiar world, mountains, rivers, grass and trees. They were all black, or in other words, they were all covered in black without exception.Covered with a thin layer of mist-like black gauze!
With these feelings and thoughts, he experienced everything that happened after the whole company assembled: attending the officer meeting and listening to Cheng Yukun convey the instructions of the deputy commander; returning to the platoon to organize the combat inspection before departure; and then standing in the queue Waiting for the time to set off. He did all this passively and absent-mindedly. The pressing problem in his heart prevented him from truly turning his attention to the outside world, but what happened outside affected him to continue to think deeply. He didn't hear Zhang Zhongliang's cry. It wasn't until Cheng Yukun ran over and yelled at Zhang Zhongliang and him that he woke up, but he didn't hear clearly what Cheng Yukun said. At this moment, there was only one simple thought that suddenly came to his mind: What is this annoying guy shouting? Let him go away quickly! Thinking of this, a vicious thought came to his mouth without any guidance.
"Company commander. He's hungry!" He shouted to Cheng Yukun, his eyes becoming bright and sharp. The effect of this sentence is indeed good. The surrounding soldiers laughed, but Cheng Yukun thought that he had been greatly insulted, shouted something at him, and walked away angrily!
"Some other things happened later, but he felt that they had nothing to do with him, but they still prevented him from returning to that layer of logical thinking where he seemed to be finding the answer soon.
Later the company set off. The sun, earth, and mountains are still black and lifeless, but they imply a more urgent meaning. A path, also covered with the black veil of death, stretched precariously toward the big ridge of No. 1 Ridge. His attention returned to the unresolved problem in his mind.
"War and death This is a problem that I don't understand. But it is a problem that I must understand," he thought. A shell flew from the direction of Mount Xilien and landed high on the hillside with a roar. His instinct He ducked backwards, not paying attention to the stones under his feet, and sat down on his butt. After the smoke dissipated. He saw several soldiers in the second row in front looking at him with sneer eyes, as if to say: Look, one shell will scare you! Shang Yujun suddenly felt his face burning again.
"Do they really think of me like that?They must think that I am afraid of death!But don't they have the slightest fear of death?" He thought, his heart started to tremble again, and he suddenly felt that if others were not afraid of death, , his fear may really be contemptible and shameful. It took more than ten minutes for another shell to come roaring over, but it had not yet hit the ground. He saw several soldiers who had just laughed at him screaming and lying on the ground, and did not get up for a long time.
"No, they are also afraid of death." He thought, and Shan's heart, which had been tortured by a sense of shame, felt better. "In that case. Why did they laugh at me just now? What is the difference between them and me? "
Another cannonball came. He prostrated on the ground again, suddenly feeling a little excited in his life.
He stood up again and climbed up the mountain ridge of No. 1 Ridge step by step. War is what he cannot understand, and death is what he fears, but this mechanical climbing action seems to have no direct relationship with the two. It is only related to another professional responsibility that has become his life instinct. It has something to do with the habit of obedience entrusted to him by this professional responsibility and gradually developed. As he walked on this path, shells flew from time to time, so his inner attention had to be partially transferred to the outside world, and the fear of death in the outside world also partially offset his inner attention to the issue of death; however, he could not Completely giving up attention to death, one cannot help but continue to think about the metaphysical reasons for war and one's own death.
This is how Shang Yujun took the 3rd platoon over the 1st and 2nd platoons to climb the No. 1 mountain ridge first: his "metaphysical" fear of war and death prevented him from fully feeling the fear of death in the outside world. The latter kind of fear reaction is insensitive and slow. Many times others feel that they should lie down quickly, but he continues to climb up the ridge as if he does not feel it. At this time, his behavior becomes a Calm and brave; before the Soviet artillery bombardment started, he turned a blind eye to the violation of regulations by the whole platoon to eat dry food. When they set off, the soldiers in the 3rd platoon had more food than the soldiers in the 1st and 2nd platoons. A little "capital" showed its effect at this critical moment; Shang Yujun himself abided by the company's regulations and did not eat compressed dry food in advance, so he was the first to get into that dizzy, two-legged state. He was in a state of weakness, reduced sensory and conscious abilities; at this time, the eighth squad leader Gong Wenxuan and the seventh squad leader Lu Liwei successively fulfilled the promises they made to him before going to bed last night. They did not let him "embarrass" him, and took turns to support him step by step. Walking upward, we finally reached the large ridge that seemed too high to climb before.
Standing with his feet on the mountain ridge line, he realized that the company commander had also completed the climb to Ridge No. 1 almost at the same time. Shang Yujun's consciousness returned to reality: Cheng Yukun did not let them stay on the mountain line for a while, so he ordered the 3rd platoon to become a sharp knife platoon and went down to Nandapo to catch up with the 8th company!
The tall and majestic peaks of Xilian Mountain hit Shang Yujun's eyes head-on. Like everything he saw today, they were covered with a terrifying black veil of death. The fear in his heart returned, so Cheng Yukun saw a fleeting hesitation on his bloodless face. But the power of obedience given to him by the sense of professional responsibility that became another part of his life instinct once again acted on his will, and Cheng Yukun's order was immediately executed.
Shang Yujun did not expect that the problem in his heart that had not been solved at the level of logical thinking would be temporarily solved due to a discovery made later in the trip.
In the first ten minutes, the high-level dual-purpose machine guns on Peak 3 of Xilian Mountain were still chasing the 3rd Platoon of the 8th Company in front, and did not notice them; however, this good luck did not last long, and when they moved slightly closer, After reaching the 3rd platoon of the 8th company, this high-level dual-purpose machine gun left the target in front and turned the muzzle towards them!
"Dong dong dong¡ª¡ª!" The first short shot hit the grass in front of him. Shang Yujun quickly fell down, and his spirit became highly alert and alert with this series of frightening sounds.
ps: "Heaven is going to entrust this person with a great responsibility. He must first turn off his mobile phone, put away his pad, unplug his network cable, disconnect his wifi, and delete his app."